You know those nights when your brain just refuses to clock out? You’re exhausted, eyes heavy, but your mind’s wide awake running staff meetings about everything from tomorrow’s to-do list to that thing you said in 2014.
I’ve started realizing that sometimes, the problem isn’t just the caffeine, or the screens, or even stress. It’s control.
Falling asleep is an act of surrender. You can’t plan it, force it, or power through it. You have to let go. And for those of us who like to feel on top of things (hi, fellow control enthusiasts), that can be harder than it sounds.
There’s this idea in Scripture about trusting God instead of leaning on our own understanding¹ — and that really is what this comes down to. We keep trying to manage everything, even the act of resting.
The Baby Who Fights Sleep (and the Adult Who Does the Same Thing)
If you’ve ever watched a baby fight sleep, you know exactly what I mean. They’ll rub their eyes, squirm, and fuss — absolutely determined to stay awake. They’re convinced they’ll miss something important if they give in.
We do the same thing. We fight rest like babies — as if letting go means something will fall apart without us. But deep down, we know that’s not true. There’s that quiet reminder that says, Be still ². You’re not the one holding everything together.
But the moment babies finally do surrender? You can see peace settle over them. Their little bodies relax, their breathing evens out, and they melt into that deep, trusting rest.
We’re not so different. We may not cry about it (well… not every night), but our minds kick and squirm the same way when it’s time to release control. We want to stay alert, solve problems, worry about things that are already in motion — all because it gives us the illusion of control.
Worry: Control’s Nighttime Cousin
Worry is our brain’s way of saying, “If I just think about this long enough, maybe I can fix it.” But worry never fixes — it only fuels. True peace comes when we finally hand it over.
I’ve learned that the calm I crave doesn’t come from solving every problem before I fall asleep; it comes from releasing them — trusting that God can handle what I can’t. That’s the kind of peace that doesn’t always make sense, but it settles the heart anyway.³
Sleep requires surrender — and that’s where faith comes in. When we finally admit, “Okay, God, You’re in charge now,” something shifts. Our minds loosen their grip, our hearts stop striving, and rest becomes possible.
It’s like our bodies are waiting for permission to relax — and that permission comes when we hand over the reins.
Creating a Rhythm That Supports Rest
Of course, surrender isn’t easy. Our bodies often need a little help to remember what peace feels like. Building a bedtime rhythm can make it easier to actually live that surrender.
Here are a few simple ways to ease your body (and your control-loving mind) into rest:
• Turn down the lights an hour before bed — it tells your body that the day is winding down.
• Diffuse calming oils like Lavender, Cedarwood, or Peace & Calming to signal safety and calm.
• Jot down your thoughts in a notebook before bed. Getting them out of your head and onto paper lets your brain know it doesn’t have to hold everything overnight.
• Try a warm drink — chamomile tea, a magnesium mocktail, or even warm milk.
• Stretch gently. Pray slowly. Both slow the body and still the mind.
• Try a natural sleep aid like my favorite: Deep Night Essence. It's melatonin-free and designed to be safe for nightly use without making you feel drowsy the next day.
None of these are about control — they’re about cooperation. You’re not forcing sleep; you’re supporting your body’s natural rhythm so it knows it’s safe to let go.
Even small bedtime rituals can become quiet acts of trust. When we do what we can and release the rest, it’s like whispering, “Okay, I’m done holding this. You’ve got it from here.”⁴
The Faith in Letting Go
Maybe tonight, instead of fighting for sleep, picture that baby finally relaxing in their parent’s arms — not because everything’s fixed, but because they know they’re safe.
That’s what surrender looks like. It’s not giving up; it’s giving over. When we take that moment to rest in faith — to trust that we don’t have to stay awake to keep life from unraveling — we find peace waiting there.
Sometimes the holiest thing you can do is close your eyes, hand it over, and rest⁵ — trusting that He’s still at work even while you sleep.
Let your thoughts settle in His hands, and remind yourself: you don’t have to stay awake to stay in control. So tonight, when you turn out the light, take a breath and let it go — all of it.
Scripture References:
¹ — Proverbs 3:5–6 (NIV)
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
² — Psalm 46:10 (NIV)
“Be still, and know that I am God.”
³ — Philippians 4:6–7 (NIV)
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
⁴ — 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)
“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”
⁵ — Matthew 11:28–30 (NIV)
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”
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You’re invited to join my newsletter, Finding What Works—a weekly-ish note from me with practical wellness tips, nostalgic nods for GenX souls, and honest reflections from someone who’s still figuring it all out (but loves sharing the good stuff along the way).
This isn’t about perfection or pressure. It’s about finding what supports us, what lights us up, and what brings us back to ourselves—together.
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✨ My blog exists because I know what it feels like to keep everything jumbled in your head — like a messy pile of clothes you can’t sort through.
Writing it all down brings clarity, calm, and sometimes even healing answers I didn’t know I was looking for.
Honestly, that’s why I keep showing up to write — it helps me make sense of things.
Even if you have no intentions of ever publishing your work, I highly recommend writing stuff down. It doesn't have to be a literary masterpiece or even full, grammatically correct sentences... just dump those random thoughts onto paper... you'll see what I mean.
*This blog centers the GenX experience, simply because that’s the lens I live through—but anyone looking for connection, natural wellness, grief support, or a little real-talk in this messy stage of life is more than welcome.
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