Healing After Loss

Uninvited Growth: Finding Strength I Never Asked For

Uninvited Growth: Finding Strength I Never Asked For
I’ve mostly thought of growth as something you intentionally choose—setting goals, learning new skills, making positive changes. But this past year has taught me there’s another kind of growth…the kind you never ask for. The kind that shows up uninvited and says, “Ready or not, here I come.”

When Eric died, I didn’t wake up stronger or wiser. I just woke up to things I had no choice but to face—going places on my own, having conversations about things I thought would wait at least another 20 years, and the quiet of a house that used to feel full. None of it felt like “personal development.” It was just survival... I was taking on each next day as it came my way with all of its challenges and demands.

And yet, looking back now, I can see how those unwanted moments have stretched me in ways I didn’t even realize. It’s not the growth I wanted, but maybe it’s the growth I needed. Moving forward feels less scary these days. I’m still healing and growing... I’m also more ready than ever for whatever life throws at me next.








If you’ve made it to the bottom of this post, I’m guessing something here resonated—whether it’s navigating grief and growth, diving into natural wellness, or just trying to live a more intentional life in a fast-paced world.

This space is where I share what I’m learning (and unlearning), the tools that are helping me along the way, and the little things that bring joy, healing, and clarity—even on the hard days.


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Have a question or something to share?

✨ My blog exists because I know what it feels like to keep everything jumbled in your head — like a messy pile of clothes you can’t sort through.
 Writing it all down brings clarity, calm, and sometimes even healing answers I didn’t know I was looking for.

Honestly, that’s why I keep showing up to write — it helps me make sense of things. 

 Even if you have no intentions of ever publishing your work, I highly recommend writing stuff down. It doesn't have to be a literary masterpiece or even full, grammatically correct sentences... just dump those random thoughts onto paper... you'll see what I mean.

*This blog centers the GenX experience, simply because that’s the lens I live through—but anyone looking for connection, natural wellness, grief support, or a little real-talk in this messy stage of life is more than welcome.

✨ My blog exists because I know what it feels like to keep everything jumbled in your head — like a messy pile of clothes you can’t sort through.

 Writing it all down brings clarity, calm, and sometimes even healing answers I didn’t know I was looking for.


Honestly, that’s why I keep showing up to write — it helps me make sense of things. 

 Even if you have no intentions of ever publishing your work, I highly recommend writing stuff down. It doesn't have to be a literary masterpiece or even full, grammatically correct sentences... just dump those random thoughts onto paper... you'll see what I mean.

*This blog centers the GenX experience, simply because that’s the lens I live through—but anyone looking for connection, natural wellness, grief support, or a little real-talk in this messy stage of life is more than welcome.

Hi! I'm AJ Flanagan.

 
Hey there — I’m AJ.

I’m an empty-nester and a widow who had a wake-up call about the hidden toxins in everyday products most of us grew up using. Our parents didn’t know. We didn’t know either. But once you start paying attention, it’s hard to ignore.

Life shifted in 2018 when my husband, Eric, was diagnosed with leukemia — and again in 2023 when we faced a second cancer diagnosis. Supporting him through treatment changed how we looked at just about everything, including how we cared for our home, our bodies, and our day-to-day routines.
We didn’t aim for perfection or extremes. We focused on simple, meaningful changes — reducing toxic load in our home, choosing better ingredients, prioritizing nourishing food, and building calmer rhythms into daily life. Tools like aromatherapy, music, meditation, and intentional rest became part of how we coped and stayed grounded.

Caring for Eric deepened my commitment to living well — not as a trend, but as a way of showing up with intention and grace, even in the hard seasons.

Now I share our story, the lessons we learned, the small changes that made a big difference, and how I'm moving forward. My hope is to make wellness feel more approachable, less overwhelming, and rooted in real life — especially for anyone who wants healthier options without pressure or perfection.

If you’re here to find what actually works for you, you’re in the right place.

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