Coping with loss

Carrying On: Rediscovering Our Shared Joys on My Own  

Carrying On: Rediscovering Our Shared Joys on My Own  
Since experiencing loss, I've noticed that engaging in activities like watching TV or revisiting shared interests without my loved one feels daunting. Shows, trips, and hobbies we once cherished together aren't the same without him. This realization isn’t merely about reluctance toward these activities themselves but a broader hesitance to relive those memories alone.

Faced with the idea of enjoying these experiences by myself, I often ask, can I truly enjoy them without him? This journey has taught me that moving forward doesn't mean forgetting—it's about blending cherished memories into my current life. Grief ebbs and flows, guiding me between moments of sadness and joy, reminding me it's okay to make space for memories while continuing to grow.

I've found solace in revisiting shared joys in smaller, manageable ways—like taking short drives or exploring history from home. These gentle steps help me feel connected without being overwhelmed, honoring the past while moving forward. It’s not about recreating what was, but about keeping the connection alive in a way that suits where I am now, reminding me and others that it’s fine to take our time rediscovering joy.
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The Duality of Grief: How Can I Feel Sad and Okay at the Same Time?

The Duality of Grief: How Can I Feel Sad and Okay at the Same Time?
Grief is a complex and unpredictable journey, weaving together moments of sadness, joy, and confusion in unexpected ways. It's not the linear, unending sorrow that many anticipate; rather, it oscillates between deep ache and fleeting peace. This duality of emotions, feeling both sad and okay at times, is a testament to the human capacity to hold space for multiple feelings simultaneously.

For those navigating the intricacies of grief, it can be unsettling to experience happiness or laughter amidst the sorrow, often leading to feelings of guilt. However, these moments of relief do not diminish the depth of one’s love or the significance of the loss. Instead, they coexist with grief, highlighting the resilience of the human spirit and its ability to find light in the darkness.

Embracing both sides of grief involves allowing emotions to flow freely, whether through crying or laughter, and understanding that each feeling has its place. Finding solace in writing, talking to others, and practicing self-kindness can offer comfort through the emotional rollercoaster. As the journey unfolds, these reflections and shared experiences reveal that navigating grief is not just about enduring sadness but also cherishing the joyful memories and moments of healing along the way.
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✨ My blog exists because I know what it feels like to keep everything jumbled in your head — like a messy pile of clothes you can’t sort through.

 Writing it all down brings clarity, calm, and sometimes even healing answers I didn’t know I was looking for.


Honestly, that’s why I keep showing up to write — it helps me make sense of things. 

 Even if you have no intentions of ever publishing your work, I highly recommend writing stuff down. It doesn't have to be a literary masterpiece or even full, grammatically correct sentences... just dump those random thoughts onto paper... you'll see what I mean.

Hi! I'm AJ Flanagan.

 
Hey there — I’m AJ.

I’m an empty-nester and a widow who had a wake-up call about the hidden toxins in everyday products most of us grew up using. Our parents didn’t know. We didn’t know either. But once you start paying attention, it’s hard to ignore.

Life shifted in 2018 when my husband, Eric, was diagnosed with leukemia — and again in 2023 when we faced a second cancer diagnosis. Supporting him through treatment changed how we looked at just about everything, including how we cared for our home, our bodies, and our day-to-day routines.
We didn’t aim for perfection or extremes. We focused on simple, meaningful changes — reducing toxic load in our home, choosing better ingredients, prioritizing nourishing food, and building calmer rhythms into daily life. Tools like aromatherapy, music, meditation, and intentional rest became part of how we coped and stayed grounded.

Caring for Eric deepened my commitment to living well — not as a trend, but as a way of showing up with intention and grace, even in the hard seasons.

Now I share our story, the lessons we learned, the small changes that made a big difference, and how I'm moving forward. My hope is to make wellness feel more approachable, less overwhelming, and rooted in real life — especially for anyone who wants healthier options without pressure or perfection.

If you’re here to find what actually works for you, you’re in the right place.

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