Intentional Living

“Why Can’t I Just Do the Thing?” Signs of Adult ADHD in Women We Don’t Talk About Enough

“Why Can’t I Just Do the Thing?” Signs of Adult ADHD in Women We Don’t Talk About Enough
You know those days where everything is set up to go smoothly—and then somehow, nothing does? Yeah. I just had another one of those mornings.

I had my water bottle prepped. I had my essential oils right there on the kitchen counter—Peppermint for focus, Citrus Fresh for a mood lift. My to-do list was written out the night before (a rare win!). But instead of starting my day with intention and clarity, I stood in the kitchen watching videos about productivity hacks while the diffuser sat there... bone dry.

I knew exactly what would help me feel better. So why couldn’t I just do the thing? And how does one little deviation from my morning routine throw me so totally off track for the rest of the day?
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Taking Control of My Story

Taking Control of My Story
Sometimes when I look back, I can see myself moving from one busy moment to the next without taking time to go about anything with intention. Feeling like I was on autopilot or just along for the ride was my normal - I don't think I ever realized it in the moment. 

With three busy kids who enjoyed being involved in EVERYTHING and knowing I wanted to be the most supportive mom I could be, I didn't often take time to stop and think, or plan anything more than the logistics of how to get everyone where they needed to be and back home to be fed before going to bed - just to begin again the next day. No regrets - I loved that part of being a mom and wouldn't change any decisions Eric and I made so that we could make it work. I loved being there for my kids. Still do, even though what that looks like has changed a lot since then. 

Looking back, aside from the intentional choice for Eric to be our breadwinner and for me to stay home with the kids, I don't know that very much else happened intentionally. We were winging it... along for the ride.
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Carrying On: Rediscovering Our Shared Joys on My Own  

Carrying On: Rediscovering Our Shared Joys on My Own  
Since experiencing loss, I've noticed that engaging in activities like watching TV or revisiting shared interests without my loved one feels daunting. Shows, trips, and hobbies we once cherished together aren't the same without him. This realization isn’t merely about reluctance toward these activities themselves but a broader hesitance to relive those memories alone.

Faced with the idea of enjoying these experiences by myself, I often ask, can I truly enjoy them without him? This journey has taught me that moving forward doesn't mean forgetting—it's about blending cherished memories into my current life. Grief ebbs and flows, guiding me between moments of sadness and joy, reminding me it's okay to make space for memories while continuing to grow.

I've found solace in revisiting shared joys in smaller, manageable ways—like taking short drives or exploring history from home. These gentle steps help me feel connected without being overwhelmed, honoring the past while moving forward. It’s not about recreating what was, but about keeping the connection alive in a way that suits where I am now, reminding me and others that it’s fine to take our time rediscovering joy.
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Winter Self-Care: Embracing Your Cocoon

Winter Self-Care: Embracing Your Cocoon
The blog post captures the comforting notion of cocooning at home during winter, highlighting how this can be both a response to personal grief and the natural tendency of introverts to recharge in the solace of quiet spaces. Winter, with its short days and long nights, often mirrors the internal pause many experience when coping with loss, making the sanctuary of one's home feel even more inviting. By embracing the idea that it's perfectly acceptable to prefer quiet moments over social gatherings, the post offers reassurance to those who feel the same pull to hibernate and navigate this heavy season gently.

It's important to recognize that cocooning at home is not about isolating completely, but rather finding balance and nurturing oneself through small, comforting rituals. This might include using calming essentials like Lavender or Northern Lights Black Spruce in a diffuser, creating a cozy space with soft lighting and blankets, or simply allowing oneself the freedom to say no to social activities. These acts of self-care foster a nurturing environment where healing can naturally occur, offering space to breathe, reflect, and process feelings without the pressure of external expectations.

The blog emphasizes that embracing this period of quietude is a seasonal phase—one that aligns with nature’s rhythm and offers a valuable opportunity for personal growth and transformation. As spring eventually arrives and the days grow longer, one will naturally feel ready to re-emerge and engage with the world anew. Until then, sharing stories and tips on finding solace during winter can remind others that it’s okay to take the time needed to rejuvenate before stepping forward renewed.
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Who Am I Without Us? Rediscovering Myself After Loss

Who Am I Without Us? Rediscovering Myself After Loss
The blog post reflects on the journey of rediscovering oneself after the passing of a life-long partner. After nearly 40 years of shared life experiences, the author finds herself grappling with her identity as she transitions from being part of an "us" to being just "me." The feelings of being left half of a whole resonate deeply, underscoring the challenges that come with redefining roles and navigating life independently.

In this period of adjustment, the focus is on growth, acknowledging that life must continue moving forward despite the absence of a beloved partner. Embracing the values and lessons learned throughout their shared life, the author seeks to find a balance between holding onto cherished memories and making space for new growth. Essential to this process is maintaining her passion for natural wellness, which involves supporting healthy body systems and reducing toxin exposure—a philosophy reinforced by her shared journey with her partner.

Ultimately, the blog emphasizes that this journey is not about reinventing oneself but rather about evolving. It highlights the importance of taking small, intentional steps into the unknown while carrying forward the love and legacy built together. Through this process of rediscovery, the author conveys hope and resilience, encouraging others facing similar transitions to embrace their journey, acknowledging it’s okay to take time and feel unsteady while moving forward one step at a time.
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✨ My blog exists because I know what it feels like to keep everything jumbled in your head — like a messy pile of clothes you can’t sort through.

 Writing it all down brings clarity, calm, and sometimes even healing answers I didn’t know I was looking for.


Honestly, that’s why I keep showing up to write — it helps me make sense of things. 

 Even if you have no intentions of ever publishing your work, I highly recommend writing stuff down. It doesn't have to be a literary masterpiece or even full, grammatically correct sentences... just dump those random thoughts onto paper... you'll see what I mean.

Hi! I'm AJ Flanagan.

 
Hey there — I’m AJ.

I’m an empty-nester and a widow who had a wake-up call about the hidden toxins in everyday products most of us grew up using. Our parents didn’t know. We didn’t know either. But once you start paying attention, it’s hard to ignore.

Life shifted in 2018 when my husband, Eric, was diagnosed with leukemia — and again in 2023 when we faced a second cancer diagnosis. Supporting him through treatment changed how we looked at just about everything, including how we cared for our home, our bodies, and our day-to-day routines.
We didn’t aim for perfection or extremes. We focused on simple, meaningful changes — reducing toxic load in our home, choosing better ingredients, prioritizing nourishing food, and building calmer rhythms into daily life. Tools like aromatherapy, music, meditation, and intentional rest became part of how we coped and stayed grounded.

Caring for Eric deepened my commitment to living well — not as a trend, but as a way of showing up with intention and grace, even in the hard seasons.

Now I share our story, the lessons we learned, the small changes that made a big difference, and how I'm moving forward. My hope is to make wellness feel more approachable, less overwhelming, and rooted in real life — especially for anyone who wants healthier options without pressure or perfection.

If you’re here to find what actually works for you, you’re in the right place.

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