I admit it... I'm a perfectionist. It has always been a bit of a double-edged sword for me. On the one hand, perfectionism has helped me accomplish things I’m proud of—attention to detail, a desire for excellence. But on the flip side, it’s paralyzed me, leaving me stuck in a loop of inaction, afraid to take the next step unless I’m sure the outcome will be perfect. If that sounds familiar, please know you’re not alone. Not by a long shot.
Lately, life has been throwing me curveballs, and I’m realizing that my drive for perfection doesn’t always serve me well—especially right now. Wondering if your own perfectionism is helping or hurting you? Read on to figure it out...
Perfectionism and Procrastination: Two Sides of the Same Coin
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been the type to obsess over getting things just right. Whether it’s a project, a plan, or even just making dinner, I need to have a clear, perfect picture of how it should turn out. Otherwise, I feel directionless.
That cluttered extra bedroom upstairs? If I don't come up with an idea of where everything will go and what I want to room to look like in the end, I'm probably never going to get it straightened up. This constant pressure to meet an unattainable standard is often what leads to procrastination—because if I can’t do it perfectly, why do it at all?
Sound familiar? We might have just become bff's.
Lately, life has changed, and with that, so has my perspective.
A Little Too Much Control
This drive for perfection used to extend to those around me, too. I’d feel unsettled if someone else’s work didn’t meet my internal expectations, and I’d have to resist the urge to jump in and "fix" it. That made life more difficult than it had to be when my kids were young. Over time, I’ve gotten better about that—I no longer expect everyone else to live by my self-imposed standards. But I’ll admit, it still sneaks out from time to time. I catch myself biting my tongue when things aren’t done exactly the way I would have done them. That tongue DOES get bitten, though... I'm learning to give up that need for control over everything!
But lately, life has changed, and with that, so has my perspective.
When Life Takes Over: Perfect Isn’t an Option
As many of you know, my husband Eric is currently going through cancer treatments, and let me tell you—this experience has brought my perfectionism to a screeching halt. There’s no such thing as perfect when you’re navigating doctor appointments, treatment and medication schedules, and sleepless nights at the hospital. The goal has shifted from trying to have everything figured out to just getting through each day as best as we can.
This experience is showing me that there’s beauty in imperfection. There’s grace in simply doing the best we can in difficult situations, and no one expects perfection—least of all Eric. He doesn’t care if I haven’t made dinner from scratch or if I’m a little behind on laundry. What matters is that we’re getting through this together. The only expectation is to keep going, not to be perfect.
Learning to Be Okay With "Good Enough"
It hasn’t been easy to let go of those perfectionist tendencies. I still catch myself planning out "ideal" scenarios in my head, imagining how things *should* be instead of accepting them for what they are. But the more I release that need for control, the lighter I feel. The more I realize that sometimes "good enough" really is enough. There are some situations where that drive for excellence (perfection) helps, but it's certainly not every situation, every day!
There’s something freeing in letting go of the perfect image I had in my head and accepting life as it comes, imperfections and all.
A Work in Progress
I wish I could say I’ve completely conquered the negative aspects of perfectionism, but that wouldn’t be true. I’m still working on it—sometimes I feel like I’m taking two steps forward and one step back. There are moments when I still catch myself trying to control things beyond my reach or get frustrated when life doesn’t meet my self-imposed standards.
But I’m learning. I’m realizing that it’s okay to be a work in progress, and that growth doesn’t come from getting it right every time. It comes from being present, doing my best, and accepting that my best changes from day to day.
I’d love to hear if perfectionism has been a part of your life too. How have you managed it? Let’s chat about it in the comments—after all, we’re all works in progress. And if this resonates with you, feel free to check out some of my other posts where I explore similar topics.
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